I’m not a Neanderthal nor do I hail from a 1950’s time warp. I do carry some old fashioned values instilled by my parents and other caring, more intelligent people than myself. To them I say, thank you!
Recently, my life‘s journey has hit a milestone I didn’t know even existed.
That’s not to say I’ve reached a learning ceiling or I’ve finally come of age so to speak. I believe that we are constantly evolving and growing until we meet our maker. It’s a non-stop cycle and those that think they know it all or think they’ve reached that goal of a well rounded, intelligently superior member of society, I say to you, “think again.”
Having said all that, please allow me to continue with my original intent for this submission.
I have, for quite some time, believed that I should be the sole provider for my family. The hunter/gatherer in me is strong, so strong in fact, it causes me to pause in most instances to question the intention, result and consequences of my actions as it pertains to my family.
Thank you for letting me paint the picture and bring you to the reason for this post.
I have conceded that my lovely wife, the mother, teacher, friend and nurse to our children should be allowed to contribute to our household on a monetary level.
You see, her contributions have been and continue to be on a level that is impossible to measure. I know I don’t thank her enough.
Her unwavering love, guidance and protection for our children means more than any job or compensation she could possibly bring to the table. That is partly the reason that I’ve always felt that I needed to be the one that brings home the bacon. She has an awesome responsibility as a mother and my smallish contribution pales in comparison.
She has recently obtained employment to help contribute to the general fund of our household. I am thrilled that she can do this.
As I thought more and more about this change to our delicately balanced micro society that functions mainly within an 1100 square foot dwelling, my thoughts began to shift. Some how, some way my fragile ego started to crumble. I thought for sure that my very existence as a man, leader, provider and protector was being compromised by encouraging my wife to go to work. How could I let this happen? Was I not a man? Was I really a spineless wimp letting her steal a piece of the power?
OMG!
Then it hit me like a runaway septic tanker truck. What an imbecile I am for my sophomoric thought processes. I really thought I was smarter than that. Thankfully, I’m smart enough to know, I’m not as smart as I’d like to be.
Time to put away my cape…
I am so damn lucky indeed.
I’m lucky enough to have been given a chance to grow in an area most men would not even dream about, let alone ask for.
I didn’t realize the colossal opportunity I was given by agreeing and encouraging my wife to go to work.
I must say I was a bit resistant to (never to admit to it) the idea that I would be alone with my two girls and be the sole provider of all the motherly things they needed. That was my first mistake on two different levels.
I’m not alone with them. I’m lucky enough to be able to spend quality time with my daughters without that motherly “interference”.
I’m not a sole provider of motherly things they need, they get that from their mother. I’ve been given an opportunity to provided the much needed fatherly things I can provide to my daughters.
As much as this might sound unappreciative towards my wife (I just know she will not see this the wrong way – Ha!), I have to admit I hope, strongly I might add, that she continues to work this job and these hours for the long term.
When I’m alone with my girls, I can’t even begin to explain how great it is. No words could ever convey the amount of love I have for them!
This is a gift that I could never, ever have hoped for. I could never thank my wife, my parents, my in-laws or my God enough for what I’ve been given.
~ One man, that much richer for the opportunity and experience!
{ 1 comment… read it below or add one }
Richness is not measured by monetary levels. You see I know this because, I too, am rich. No, I don’t have two nickels to rub together nor do I care if I ever do. But, I do know I am rich. I also know that a lot of people just don’t “get it”. I am 53 years old and even though I am “still evolving” I have evolved enough to see things pretty clearly. As virtually a stranger looking in, I see a strength and beauty and richness in your family right down to those gorgeous little girls. I’m glad you “get it” and can embrace your richness. As for Tami, you go girl.